I recently sent a note out to all of my subscribers to let them know I was going to reveal my true identity this week. For those of you who are subscribers, you may have noticed the little hint that I put in my e-mail.
The reason I did not share my full identity at first is because I wanted to make sure I would be completely honest, which was easier if I was not concerned about people I know discovering my blog. As you know, I never told anyone about having an eating disorder – except my parents when I was in college – and more recently, my husband.
Instead, I worked hard to the point of burnout, trying to be “perfect” in everything I did, in order to seek the approval that I did not have for myself. Through my recovery, all of this changed. And through this blog – and your love, beautiful comments and support – I gained courage.
In this, my fourth month of blogging, I want to say thank you, wholeheartedly, to all of you. When I first set out to start a blog, I didn’t know if anyone else out there was blogging about eating disorders. I was fairly new to the blogging world – with the exception of my other blog (see below), so I didn’t realize there were communities of people blogging their perspectives on just about everything!
I was happy to find Michelle, Emily, Karen, Esperanza, Frida, Miss Blue, Christine, Mata Hari Mom (I’m hoping she’ll return!), Jackie and Merina. There are so many more that I still haven’t found, but the news everyone is sharing is that we are not alone. Who’d have thought we could find such love and support in the blogosphere – our own virtual community on the path to recovery.
Blogging and coaching others to recovery from eating disorders has become my higher purpose. Already a Certified Professional Coach – and through the past four months – a Certified Body Ecologist – my life took on a richness when I realized my mission to help people heal. There is nothing better than working with someone and witnessing as she discovers her true essence – the joy of living!
Of course, I spent a lot of time wondering what people were going to think when they found out about my secret past. But because of the support I’ve gotten from you, I gained the courage to step out and say who I am. And even the latest “picture sharing” from my fellow bloggers contributed to my growing courage. I celebrate with you – and I thank you all – for just being who you are and for sharing your reading time with me!
With love,
Heather Fougnier
Here are links to all of my sites – with pictures and information:
Professional Coaching Websites (these have my picture and information about coaching)
- Now Radiant Health – Aligning mind, body & spirit to create vibrant, radiant health
- Success Summits – Taking high performers to the top – in business & personal life
Personal Blog: This blog has pictures of me, my husband, Joel, and our life in a tiny third-world style Caribbean island.
- Live Your Caribbean Dream – the real-life journal of two thrity-somethings who escaped the rat race to live in paradise.
WOW, Heather!!! Thank you for opening up to us and sharing! It is so great to see someone’s picture after having communicated with them for such a long time! It definitely blows you away when you have formed a picture of someone in your mind, and it turns out they look completely different! That isn’t in any way better or worse – just different. I think when I thought of you, I always had the picture of one of my classmates in mind. Your energy reminded me of her. She, too, is fascinated with nutrition and devotes a lot of time and energy to cooking for her own healing, as well as advising others about diet and lifestyle for theirs. She has struggled with chronic fatigue for many years, and diet has played a huge part in her recovery. From thinking of her and all of your interests, I guess I had imagined you to look more “hippie-ish.”
I think I also could have guessed from your background, however, that you would be a very professional-looking, well-dressed and -groomed woman!
What strikes me about you is that you have a beautiful smile and open, loving face! You are a stunning woman, Heather, and I can see the positivity and dedication radiate out from your picture!
I look forward to spending more time on your various websites and getting to know you more. I have to admit, it is almost a bit overwhelming at the moment how much there is to catch up on. I will work my way through it, slowly, but surely. I have taken a look at your other blog, the about us section on you and Joel, and some of the pictures of your little Carribean paradise. I love that you and Joel (hey, just noticed you have a ‘J’, too!
) have made the choice to completely change your lives around in your pursuit of happiness and seem to be loving it! He seems like a great guy – and you wouldn’t deserve any less than that! 
great big hug!
love,
Emily
Comment by Emily — June 15, 2006 @ 1:03 am
Hi Heather
THank you for sharing I had gone on the Caribean website and read about you there
I am looking forward to reading the other blogs
Ihave been in a weird spot I am really having difficulty with my eating and am engaging in some ppurging which I dont like And I come up with good reasons to do it.
The constipationis rulingmy body right now and I am so uncomfortable
I was at my urologist Tuesday and they re programmed by neuro stim Its mor in the back and they wer hoping it would also help myIBS but then Iam taking pain meds so that slows it down
I am starting a 10 session rolfing treatment. I am looking forward to that I also need to reschedule my Rhonda Lenair appointment
Pleae convince me that I need to see her
I thnak you for all that you have given me and now with this new information it can only get better
withh love
KAren
Comment by karen — June 15, 2006 @ 12:10 pm
Congratulations, Heather- for your courage and honesty in sharing your full identity and for fulling owning every facet of your wonderful, radiant self!
Thank you so humbly for sharing.
WIth love,
Maya
Comment by Maya — June 16, 2006 @ 6:54 am
Hi Emily, Thank you — it is funny how we create a mental image of someone until we get their picture, isn’t it?
Well, I so appreciated seeing your pictures as well and the whole trend that came about in our community of bloggers.
I was terrified to make the switch to my new life — and even felt guilty about it for awhile, which kept me from enjoying it fully. Until I realized that my mind was keeping me stuck. All I had to do was choose to love my life and then it happened. That’s when I learned that the grass is never greener on the other side — I was on the other side and still feeling guilty! It’s really only greener on our own side when we choose to embrace it. So interesting, this life full of lessons!
P.S. I noticed when I was reading your blog that we both have J’s too!
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — June 16, 2006 @ 1:05 pm
Hi Karen, I want you to know that I am sending positive energy and love your way during this difficult time. I hope the steps you are taking work out for you. Rolfing is wonderful — Joel and I both got 13 sessions and felt terrific afterwards. My whole body felt lighter and just thinking about it makes me want to go get a few more sessions! Let me know how you like it.
I was wondering if writing would help you work through some of what’s going on right now? For example, what feelings are you having underneath the pain and the eating? What thoughts are you having? Is it possible to really be aware of those thoughts and feelings? See if they are more on the negative or positive side.
Believe me, I can identify with you if they are more on the negative when you have chronic pain. I found it very difficult to be positive when I had terrible digestive pain — and you are going through a lot more than that. This means it may be even harder to think and feel positive thoughts. It may take more effort, more awareness. For this reason, I wonder if maybe even lying down and meditating on positive thoughts — even for just a minute or 10 minutes each day. It’s like a dose of love for yourself — and you deserve it!
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — June 16, 2006 @ 1:11 pm
Hi Maya, You’re welcome and thank you for being one of the beautiful reasons that I built up the courage to share!
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — June 16, 2006 @ 1:12 pm