I’m not sure if you remember my post on how to banish negative thoughts, which highlighted “The Work” of Byron Katie? I had the opportunity to see Byron Katie live several years ago, when I had experienced a relapse after 1.5 years of recovery. At the time, I was dealing with some intense anger and pain regarding a person at work — and all the feelings that came along with being in a job that did not suit me. I really loved Byron Katie’s approach of questioning our thoughts — especially those that don’t serve us.
A Great New Blog!
I wanted to draw your attention to her new blog because it’s an excellent resource! In her blog, she has both written transcripts and videos where she facilitates people in pain through the process of The Work. The Work is basically 4 simple questions that allow us to really get a look at the thoughts we focus on in our minds. After going through these questions, you can really start to see how the thoughts you carry — or your story about yourself — can either help or hinder you.
Two Posts I Loved – Check Them Out
I was particulary struck by two of her posts — one was “I hate my husband,” which is a transcript where Byron Katie facilitates a woman through her thoughts about hating her husband — and we really find out that she doesn’t love herself. The other is a video facilitation of a young woman who feels pain over her mother who is controlling and manipulative. We find out that the young woman is actually needing belief, faith and validation of her own feelings — rather than looking for them to be validated by anyone else (even her mother).
What I Learned
What I learned from Byron Katie’s blog is more confirmation of what I’ve always believed about law of attraction and our thoughts. Most of the time, we are thinking thoughts through the filter of “our story” — or what we think about ourselves based on past events and condiditioning. It’s seen through our fears, our beliefs and often, limited thinking. How do we know it’s limited thinking? It makes us feel bad, holds us back from trying things, keeps us with people out of fear, brings pain, sadness and grief — keeps us stuck. When we are focused on thoughts that support us, we feel good — happy, peaceful, calm, content, joyful, energized, loving, compassionate.
Negative Thoughts As Lint?
I walked away from reading Byron Katie’s blog and I realized this: any thought I have is bundled up in a bunch of other crap. It’s kind of like pants with lint on them. They might be nice pants and I may really love them, but if they have lint all over them, they look pretty crappy. When I look in the mirror, all I can see is the lint. When I see the lint, I think the pants look terrible — no matter how beautiful they may really be. Our life process is to remove the lint from the beautiful souls we are underneath. With negative thoughts, the mirror of our mind can only see the negativity, not what’s really there underneath.
We have the choice to focus on the positive — to remove the lint and see what’s really there. The Work is a great lint remover — a nice technique to work with our thoughts and realize what’s really there underneath. And if nothing else, it’s a reminder that there is no reason to get caught up in thoughts that make us feel bad. We can remember that they are just covered with lint – -and until we remove the lint, we have no idea what’s really going on — so why waste time feeling bad about it???? 
My Own Practice of Lint Removal
Yesterday, Joel and I went our our pilgrimmage to get our farm share of organic vegetables. It’s a 1.5 hour roundtrip and we typically do our grocery shopping on the way home. It was a gray day and I was feeling a bit stressed due to my book deadline, our upcoming move to Utah for the winter and balancing my business. It seemed like one of those bleak days and my mind started to get bleak along with it. Then I remembered what I learned on Byron Katie’s blog and it hit me…my thoughts are just bundled up with a bunch of crap and that’s all I could see at the moment. It was comforting to know that it was just a phase and I didn’t have to put any weight on those thoughts — I could just let them go. I didn’t even go through the 4 questions — I just trusted that if I let the negative thoughts go, I’d no longer have to focus on the “lint” — and I could get on with feeling peacful and content.
Power of Choice
Our minds are funny things — they are such obedient masters and do whatever we tell them to do. We get caught up in thinking our mind controls us, but it is really we who control our minds. We have the choice. We have the power. It takes dedication, practice and trust to live with this power of choice — and it is so worth it!
Heathr
I have been aware of Byron Katies work for along time I have gone in and out of it for a while But as it has been my nature when it gets hard or the questions are too hard and I get afraid and then i leave I have been reading her blog and I do love what she says and she makes so much sense Someday I would like to see her. She is on my list of all the people I would go listen to speak and go to ther workshops, If I only had the money
Right now I am looking foir the truths and the ways tio make me well As you said I am whole and complete I remember that of course from Louse Hay who Ifollowed for many years
I have been in intense intestinal pain for about20 hours now and I am try to keepmy self as relaxed and calm and warm as I can
And I need to go tothe doctor
Much love
KAren
Comment by karen — September 15, 2006 @ 11:02 am
I am trying to banich negagive thoughts
She wil be in Pasadena next weeek with Wayne Dyer
KAren
Comment by karen — September 15, 2006 @ 11:04 am
I can’t wait to check it out.
Comment by Palmtreechick — September 15, 2006 @ 12:09 pm
Hi Karen — bravo, you are perfect, whole and complete just as you are! Isn’t it interesting how sometimes things seem so hard for us to do? I totally understand that because when we are in pain, everything seems hard. I guess the idea is that if we can separate the physical pain from our minds, we might just be able to have a happy experience, regardless of what’s going on in our body. Hmmm, that’s like a tongue twister for the mind, since mind and body are so inter-related.
My thoughts on that is that if we can free one, it may recruit the other to be free. So if I am in physical pain and I set my mind free, the joy in my mind may send signals to my body to release tense muscles and other hormones, neurotransmitters, nutrients, etc. to help my body heal. Or vice versa. As my physical body feels good, it may send serotonin (located in the gut) and other feel-good hormones and nutrients to my mind, to set it free.
Our bodies are certainly geared to do this, so the trick is figuring out how we can make them work for us in a holistic way. If both mind and body are bogged down in pain and grief, there is no one working to recruit the other back into health. It reminds me of a story I heard from survivors of that crashed plane in the Andes (the Alive movie was based on it) — one of the survivors said that every time one of them was about to give up hope, another one was feeling strong and buoyed their spirits up so they would want to live. That’s how they got through. Wouldn’t it be great if our mind and body were that kind of team????
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — September 15, 2006 @ 1:16 pm
Heather, I’ve been working in this same way, but with my emotions. When an emotion comes up, I try to fully experience JUST the emotion without any story hooked into it. What ends up happening is that the emotion quickly disappears. It’s the same thing as Byron Katie’s work… but I got the technique from Gangaji’s book Diamond in Your Pocket. (and my friend Marty, who studied with Gangaji.) It’s really about being present and in your body so that the stories don’t run the show. Thanks for the post!
Comment by Christine Kane — September 28, 2006 @ 9:21 pm
Hi Sarah, Wow, I love that you created your own set of questions! Funny, it’s the process of becoming aware of our thoughts and working with them that becomes so important. And that we get so bundled up in thoughts and emotions when we just let them roam free — all twisted up in our “story.” I’ll try your questions next time too — thanks for sharing!
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — October 1, 2006 @ 9:58 pm
Hi Christine, I’m so glad you mentioned that — it’s a wonderful and amazing experience, isn’t it? I tried that for the first time in the beginning of my recovery at my home in Saba. I was lying on my bed and there was this emotion of depression. Well, Saba is a small island surrounded by the ocean, so it is a very healing environment. I felt the gentle ocean breeze and the ebbing and flowing of the ocean waves — and that’s what I felt the emotion doing. Just ebbing and flowing through me — so I didn’t have to grab onto it or own it. I just let it wash through.
I got that from Eckart Tolle and didn’t know about Gangaji — now I’m excited to pick up Diamond in Your Pocket! I think it’s so great that you are doing this with such great results! Thanks for the reminder of something that works so beautifully — I hope others will try it too and share their experiences!
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — October 1, 2006 @ 10:04 pm