Hello friends, thank you so much for all of your e-mails and comments. I really appreciate your kind words and feedback on my blog — and for sharing your stories. We are all connected, aren’t we? Sometimes, eating disorders serve to not only disconnect our minds & bodies — but to also disconnect us from others. Often, it is connection that we crave — and yet, it seems risky. What I love about the Internet community of blogs and forums is that it has allowed us a safe way to reach out.
A Path Back to Connection
The medical profession has recognized alternative health professionals, like Chiropractors, as paths to brining people back into health care. I believe the Internet will be an avenue that serves to bring us back to each other. It allows us the safety to be who we really are. And interestingly enough, when we are “out there” being who we really are, others reach out and support us. Imagine what that feels like when we apply it to our lives? When we reach out to others in our daily lives — they will also support us.
How do I know that? If we think about blogs and forums — they are created for and by people with similar goals, objectives or issues. They are created by people who WANT to connect. If you think about this, when we go out and choose friends, we might consider selecting friends who have similar goals, values and objectives. This doesn’t mean our friends have to have the same issues — just that there is a common thread in our values. You can tell by experimenting with being who you really are. Who do you attract? Who attracts you? Who really accepts you for who you really are? Who provides unconditional love?
Aligning Values in Relationships
In my recovery, I started to do an inventory of the friends and relationships I had created — and I realized something important. I went out and made friends of convenience. I picked who I really liked based on where I worked, mostly. And while many of them are wonderful people, I was working in a job that was not aligned with who I really am. After awhile, I started doing activities outside of work that were aligned with who I am (yoga, retreats, seminars, groups, etc.). I started to meet more and more people who had values aligned with mine. I started to feel safer to be who I really am. I took risks saying what was in my heart.
After awhile, I started to take more risks being myself at work — and it was great. It allowed me to clear my life of people I didn’t want as friends (tended to drain my energy or I had to work too hard) and fill my life with friends who liked me for me. Funny how with Internet communities, there is an automatic filter based on topic, goals, etc. that allows us to decide where we want to spend our time. We can change our minds if it’s not working for us. It’s as easy as that. It’s trickier with human relationships, but it can be done. You deserve to have people in your life who love you for YOU. Sometimes, it’s just being open to attracting these people into your life — just trusting they will show up. I tried this, and even in the remote area where I lived, it started to happen.
And it’s happening here in the Internet community. We can create safe spaces — with unconditional love — where we can come together and share our struggles and triumphs. Where we can create connections that warm our hearts and open our eyes to possibility.
Free Coaching Group – Details Coming Soon
I would like to create such a group — a safe space for a group to gather with the goal of recovery. This group will be free and I plan to facilitate it by bringing my life coaching and recovery experience to the group. If you’re wondering how coaching can help, I have created a page that explains it here (right hand navigation area of this blog). The group will likely have between 6 – 8 people and will likely meet by phone. Time frame will be in the summer of this year and I will set up a form so those who are interested can apply.
Thank you again for making this blog an even more rewarding experience for me — you are proof that we are all connected.
With love,
Heather
I would like to join the internet web coaching. I have been bulimic for many years, and am now seeking help.
thanks in advance for you time.
sincerely
barbara
Comment by barbara — March 16, 2006 @ 10:35 pm
Hi Barbara, thank you for writing and letting me know you are interested. I will be sure to e-mail you as soon as I put together the details of the group. Until then, I am happy to hear that you are seeking help with bulimia — and I offer you my support in your recovery.
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — March 17, 2006 @ 6:41 pm
Heather,
I am interested in transcending bulimia. About 8 years ago I lost my recovery of 10 years and have not been able to go without the coping behavior for more than one day.
I am greatly encouraged by reading your web site. If I can get by the rest of this day I will have 4 days in a row not binging and purging.
Sincerely,
Kata
Comment by kata — March 20, 2006 @ 9:42 pm
Hi Kata, thank you for writing. It sounds like you are ready to move forward and I congratulate you for your progress. I was in the same boat — not being able to go without for more than one day. That means 3 days, 4 days, etc. is a triumph! It shows that you have the ability to recover again.
What would it be like to live each day as if it were the only day that mattered? I understand the desire to count days — I find myself doing this as well. Lately, I’ve been bringing my mind back to this day. This day is the only day that matters. The idea is so that you avoid putting the pressure of # of days as success.
I’m glad you are interested in the class — I will let you know as soon as I have the details together.
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — March 21, 2006 @ 7:23 am
Heather,
Thank you so much for this web site. I am checking in at least once a day but I’m a little shy about posting.
Have a great day.
kata
Comment by kata — March 23, 2006 @ 2:10 pm
Hi Kata, thank you for posting — I love to hear from people reading my blog and am very touched that you have been commenting! This is a space where we can be just who we are, so I appreciate you lending your voice!
With love,
Heather
Comment by Heather — March 23, 2006 @ 3:47 pm
Heather,
The coaching group that you are starting sounds wonderful, count me in!
I think as I said before, I can’t do recovery alone.
Turtle
Comment by turtle — April 12, 2006 @ 6:28 am