Many of you know that part of my recovery proceses was resolving physical pain I had experienced since way before bulimia ever showed up in my life.
Yet just as important, I had started to change emotionally and spiritually as well. The interesting thing is, for me, it wasn’t until I reached a level of physical balance that everything clicked into place.
I know that everyone is different…healing is very personal and can vary with each individual.
But it seems that one thing is true for everyone. And it’s this idea of balance. I would define balance as feeling centered and grounded. It does not mean that everything is “perfect” all the time. Someone once said that it’s like being on a seesaw — sometimes you’re up, sometimes you’re down and sometimes you’re evenly balanced in the middle. The idea is NOT to stay stagnant, but to have a sense that there is a flow…and to trust that flow.
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Over the past 4 months, I have been in the process of writing a book. At first, I was pushing and forcing myself to write, which started to feel like pressure…pretty soon, the book writing moved from passion to pressure!
Have you ever done that? Felt like you really wanted to do something and then set all kinds of unrealitic goals for yourself…until you felt overwhelmed or pressured? Well, there I was, at the brink of blaming myself for not being fast enough or productive enough (remember my theme from the previous couple of posts?)…until I stopped just shy of going there.
See, while I’m still practicing, I am finally getting it. I can create my own goals that FEEL GOOD in terms of the pace I set — so that I can stay in balance in my life. So that I can love the goals I am passionate about. And so they don’t turn from passion to pressure.
So I shifted my focus to ALLOWING.
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I recently attended the Tampa I Can Do It Conference and it was amazing! For anyone who’s been wondering whether or not to go, I highly recommend any of the Hay House conferences.
In Tampa, I saw Caroline Myss speak live for the first time and I enjoyed her presentation (she was a keynote speaker).
Tonight, she is going to be on Hay House Radio (internet radio) talking about anorexia, bulimia and self esteem. Here are some of my thoughts on eating disorders and the Chakras AND how to listen in on Caroline Myss tonight (or later at your own pace):
Caroline Myss
Saturday, November 24, 2007
6:00 pm – 7 pm Pacific Time or 9:00 pm – 10:00 pm Eastern Time (USA)
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Rhonda Lenair is a medical intuitive who helped me recover from bulimia.
I remember when I first learned about Rhonda. It was in one of those magazines they give out at health food stores. At the time, I was pretty much at rock bottom in my desperation to recover. I was desperate to do something to change my life.
The advertisement caught my interest — and while I was not sure what to believe, it reasonated with me somehow. I secretly POURED over Rhonda’s website for hours, trying to make a decision to spend more money than I’d ever thought I was worth for a healing service.
I decided to take a chance and invest in my recovery from bulimia.
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I have had many questions lately about dealing with physical pain in recovery.
If you currently have an eating disorder, you may have pain. In fact, you may be in a holding pattern with pain, where it has become the norm for you. So much so that you don’t really feel it.
Some of the pain I had before recovery from bulimia:
- Foggy thinking – I had a great memory and while I often felt full of energy, I felt like I had to expend extra energy working through a veil of fog during my day.
- Digestive pain – gas, bloating, constipation and often, crippling digestive pain.
- Body pain – The track of pain was in the “stomach meridian” in Chinese medicine (from my mouth, up to my head and down through my neck, to my shoulder and all the way down to my big toe). While the pain varied, it was interesting to see that it tracked this meridian. Even more interesting is that the spirit of this meridian is “purpose of life,” the orifice is the mouth and the chakras are the 2nd and 3rd (solar plexus, our power house).
I had the same idea I think we all have…in recovery, I’ll feel much better, right?
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I wanted to share this article from Gary Craig’s Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) website. This excerpt, written by a doctor is amazing!
He covers evertything from IBS, back pain, depression, panic attacks, anxiety, migraines and emotional eating. This doctor learned that energy work can help with chronic unresolved illness and emotional issues. His finding is that our bodies store this pain because we cannot deal with the emotions, beliefs or trauma that cause us pain, so we suppress them.
Our body then experiences pain as a way to divert us from having to deal with the pain. This is the same finding that Dr. Darren Weissman had when creating the Lifeline Technique and writing his book, The Power of Infinite Love & Gratitude.
This is a long article, but worth reading – take a look at the parts I bolded which pertain to eating disorders and self-sabotage in recovery.
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